


As you mean to go on.

by electricteatime



Category: Dirk Gently's Holistic Detective Agency (TV 2016)
Genre: DGHDA Reverse Bang, Dirk and Todd are dumbasses, Idiots in Love, Jacket sharing, Locked Out, M/M, New Years Eve, Post Case fic, references to Canon typical violence, references to pararibulitis
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-01
Updated: 2020-01-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 07:01:17
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,325
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22072939
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/electricteatime/pseuds/electricteatime
Summary: "If next year is anything like this one, I don't think it'll be too bad." Todd admits quietly, caught smiling when Dirk turns his head to look up at him, soft and pleased and a little surprised.***Dirk and Todd find themselves locked out of their apartment on New Years Eve, following what can only be described as a series of universe related disasters. They try to make the best of it.
Relationships: Todd Brotzman/Dirk Gently
Comments: 22
Kudos: 94
Collections: DGHDA Brave New Year Reverse Bang 2019





	As you mean to go on.

**Author's Note:**

> After telling myself I wouldn't get involved in another Big Bang this year, I'm here to offer this short fic I ended up writing anyway for the DGHDA Reverse Bang. It's not much, but I really wanted to write a short scene based off of the art submitted by [pixeliis](https://pixeliis.tumblr.com/) [that you can find here](https://pixeliis.tumblr.com/post/190003100948/my-part-of-the-dghdabigbang-my-writer-was) and managed to throw this together in time to ring in 2020 with the rest of you! 
> 
> As ever thanks to [Hellz](https://dont-offend-the-bees.tumblr.com/) for organising and looking this over for me, and thanks to [pixeliis](https://pixeliis.tumblr.com/) for the wonderful art! I hope you all enjoy <3

There are times when Todd thinks he isn't ever going to get used to the sheer, unmitigated chaos that his life has become ever since Dirk had barrelled into it two years ago. It's not like he'd change it, other than perhaps making things a little quieter for them both, he'd made his decision and he's going to stick to it no matter what. Still, he can't help but feel like after the universe had sent them a greetings card by way of blowing up the diner they'd decided to go to for dinner, and then sent them on a wild goose chase running all over the city in an attempt to track down the owner of a prized parrot that had supposedly predicted it only to find out it was a budgie and no such prediction had ever been made, locking them out of their apartment was a bit much.

In the end, even if the budgie hadn't known anything useful the owner had, and it had been a relief to see him bundled into a waiting police car at the end of it all. Todd can't say the thought is doing much to keep him warm though.

"I don't think the universe likes us going on dates." Dirk says absently, breaking the silence between them far more quietly than he usually does.

"You _think_?" Todd tries not to sound too bitter, god knows Dirk doesn't deserve it, but he's tired and hungry and cold, his head hurts, ears still ringing from the noise and every muscle in his body protesting even the slightest movement as a hangover from the attack that had followed. His pills were in the jacket he lost, he reminds himself, trying not to let it panic him when he can feel the icy wind seeping into his bones knowing full well another attack right now might just wipe him out for days.

Dirk sighs softly, shuffling a little closer to Todd along the curb. "At least we solved the case," he tries, casting Todd a hopeful smile which turns into a slight frown as he looks him over. "Are you cold?"

"Aren't you supposed to be a detective?" He bites back through clenched teeth, jaw held tight to stop them clattering together with his shivering. Todd _knows_ he's not being fair right now, but it's hard to care when he's sure he's going to shake himself apart with the chill, or start feeling like he's being slowly frozen to death with no way to stop it any minute.

He's just about to tuck his fingers further under his armpits when something warm and heavy settles around his shoulders, and when he opens his eyes he finds Dirk smiling at him, pressing a kiss to his forehead before sitting back down next to him.

"There," he says, looking inordinately pleased with himself as Todd flushes pink across the bridge of his nose in a way he would absolutely blame on the chill if he had to. "It wouldn't do to have you catch your death of cold."

Todd just stares for the longest moment, only moving to fit his arms through the sleeves and on any other night he'd probably put up more of a fight but right now even he can't really argue against the residual body heat he's quickly soaking up. It's a comforting weight, and something soft and happy settles into his chest in a way he's trying to ignore because this jacket is Dirk's most prized possession and Todd _knows_ he wouldn't give it away easily. It makes him feel special.

And, of course, like even _more_ of an asshole for his earlier bitterness.

"Thanks." He offers instead of his usual argument, sitting back now the icy wind isn't cutting through him as much. "Aren't you gonna get cold?"

Dirk shrugs, looking perfectly happy with the situation and not at all like he's going to freeze to death. Bastard.

"You always run colder than I do. Besides, it's my fault you lost _your_ jacket so it's only fair."

Todd fidgets with the edge of the sleeve, a little too long with the way he's sat. "It's not your fault."

This time, Dirk's shrug is a lot less happy. It doesn't escape Todd's notice that he isn't looking at him.

" _Hey_ , I'm serious it's not-"

"I cancelled our plans for Hobbs and Tina's party."

"Well _yeah_ but-"

"I was the one who _insisted_ we work the case on New Years Eve, even though I _knew_ you wanted to go and see them."

"I think _you_ were more excited than I-"

"I said we should go out for dinner, I picked the diner, I was the whole _reason_ we were there when it _blew up_! I lost the keys while we were running around like _lunatics_ and I-"

" _Dirk!"_

He stops abruptly, deflating now his words have run out and sinking into himself as he shakes his head. Todd's heart aches a little.

"Look. You were right, okay? You were right about the case, and you were right that we needed to be there. Who knows how many more places that guy would have hit at midnight. It's not- the universe _sucks_. It's not you."

It's Todd's turn to sigh now, shifting his weight to rest his arms on his knees and only just keeping himself from dropping his head into his hands. Dealing with Dirk's spirals isn't the most fun at the best of times, but aching all over when all he really wants to do is curl up around Dirk in bed and pass out for twelve hours is _certainly_ not the best time.

"I just- I was _hoping_ we'd have a nice time. Eventually. It's meant to be..." Dirk settles, looking up at the buildings around them, the first hints of snow falling down from the sky as Todd watches him from the corner of his eye and tries to ignore the way his toes are going numb. "It's the _New Year_ , Todd. That's- you're meant to have _good_ things happen then. And instead we ended up getting _blown up_ and chasing a _budgie_ across downtown Seattle. You got _hurt_ and now we're home and we can't even get _inside_ and the whole thing is- well. It's a disaster isn't it?"

Infuriatingly Dirk _still_ isn't looking at him, and while Todd is getting much better at understanding exactly what any particular situation needs he can admit that it's far _easier_ to do that when he can see Dirk's face. Either way Todd is good at working with what he has, so he tries not to let that put him off.

"Honestly? It- y'know, it sounds like we're starting as we mean to go on." It's a joke, for the most part, and he keeps his hopeful watch on Dirk until he seems to relax some more.

"I-" Dirk’s huff of laughter is a victory, even if it sounds derisive. "I suppose you're right." Todd does his best not to look too pleased with himself when Dirk finally turns to look at him, a hesitant smile making its way onto his face. "Next year is likely to be just as much of a disaster as this one. All the others have been."

This time Todd lets himself smile properly, bumping their shoulders together as he rolls his eyes. "Come on, it's not been _all_ bad. I've _definitely_ had worse times."

"Worse than when you got attacked by a _badger_?" Dirk looks playful now, and Todd has never been more pleased to see it.

"That was _one_ time, and I fought it off!"

"Oh yes, you looked _very_ dashing with that garden hose. Certainly one of your finer moments."

"Shut _up_ ," he grins, shoving at Dirk's shoulder. "At least I didn't scream at the sight of a _rabbit_."

"Hey! That rabbit came out of _nowhere_ , and it hopped _very_ aggressively. I will not be blamed for taking precautions."

Todd raises his eyebrows, unimpressed. "You screamed and ran back inside the house."

"Fleeing is a perfectly valid response in the face of danger." Dirk sniffs, but he leans into Todd's side all the same, grin spreading across his face. For a minute Todd is happy just to let the silence sit between them, the soft familiarity of it warming them both.

"If next year is anything like this one, I don't think it'll be too bad." Todd admits quietly, caught smiling when Dirk turns his head to look up at him, soft and pleased and a little surprised.

"You think so?"

He shrugs, the surge of affection that runs through him is nothing short of _ridiculous_ and he's sure the smile on his face looks _far_ too sentimental for his liking. It's not all bad when only Dirk can see it though.

"Yeah," he nods, brushing Dirk's hair out of his eyes where it had fallen, having given up on being anything remotely like 'in place' hours ago. "I mean. You're gonna be there so you know. Just about better than completely shit."

Dirk had learned to speak Todd a long time ago now, and he beams at the words, sitting up far too quickly and narrowly avoiding smacking his head into Todd's chin on the way up.

"Well if _you're_ there then I think it'll be nothing short of _perfect,_ " he assures him, leaning in to place a fond kiss on Todd's cheek, breath hitching in surprise when Todd turns into it instead, cupping his jaw so he can kiss him properly.

It doesn't last long, just enough for Dirk to look vaguely starstruck when they finally pull apart, and Todd knows the heat creeping up his ears likely means he's far pinker than can be blamed on the wind. He takes a moment to watch Dirk before he clears his throat, pulling himself to his feet and holding his hand out to pull Dirk up too.

"C'mon," he says, decisive as he tilts his head towards their building. "It's way too fucking cold to stay out here all night."

"I-" Dirk looks between Todd and the building, puzzled frown creeping back onto his face. "We don't have the _keys,_ Todd. We wouldn't be out here if we did."

"Yeah, well. I was gonna wait it out but this is just dumb so-" he shrugs, tugging on Dirk's hand to lead him round the back. "Brick through the window it is. We can claim it on expenses or some shit."

Dirk's laugh is bright and delighted, face lighting up as he follows Todd with a little more eagerness than he probably should.

"Farah is going to be _so_ mad at you," he warns, not sounding at all put off by the fact.

"We're not going to _tell_ Farah it was me."

Dirk hums, "She'll know anyway."

"Yeah, well. She can't prove anything."

She probably _could_ , and they both know it. It doesn't matter though, not when _finally_ getting out of the cold and into _bed_ is so close within reach. Todd's broken enough windows in his time to know how not to make _too_ much of a mess, but he still checks his watch when he picks up the brick, noting they have a few minutes left before midnight arrives.

"Probably best to wait for the fireworks," he suggests, looking up at the empty sky and wrinkling his nose when the snow hits his face.

"Hm," Dirk hums thoughtfully, tugging Todd towards him by the front of his jacket. "In that case I suppose I should wish you a happy new year now. Just so we don't miss it while you're engaged in gallant acts of rebellion."

His smile is warm and playful, and Todd half wishes he wasn't as weak to Dirk's antics as he is. It's hard to complain about it now though, the night air cold around them and Dirk pressed warm against his front, just close enough to force Todd to tilt his head back to see him properly.

"Probably should." He agrees, ignoring the way his heart is pounding in his chest like it always does with Dirk. Like he hasn't kissed him hundreds of times before, like every time is new and exciting and enough to make him feel like a nervous teenager all over again. Todd swears he used to be cooler than this.

Dirk just watches him for a moment, happy in that soft way he often is when he looks at Todd, a little unearned awe seeping into the expression. Todd is just about to look away under the weight of it when Dirk leans in for the second time that night, catching his mouth in a warm, gentle press of lips that leaves Todd feeling breathless even with its simplicity.

"Happy New Year, Todd," he says softly, pressing a fond kiss to his cheek before he goes. Todd feels like he must look at least a little dazed, but seeing as Dirk looks that way too he's not sure there's much to complain about.

"Yeah. Yeah, Happy New Year, Dirk." He grins, shaking his head at their combined incompetence, fond and happy enough to forget why they're even back here until the sky above them explodes in light and sound, breaking their peace with the arrival of midnight finally bringing in a new year.

The brick through the window manages to go unnoticed in the commotion, although Todd doubts it will go unnoticed by Farah when she gets back from Tina's the next day. It doesn't matter though, he decides as he _finally_ curls around Dirk in the warmth of their own bed, exhaustion rushing through him with enough force that he finds it hard to keep his eyes open against their own weight. Dirk laces their fingers together and presses a kiss to the back of his hand, and Todd decides that in the end they'd definitely managed to start as they mean to go on.

**Author's Note:**

> If you liked this chapter please leave a comment! It's pretty much the only kind of payment I get for this so you know, that'd be cool of you <3
> 
> You can catch me at [kieren-fucking-walker](http://kieren-fucking-walker.tumblr.com/) on tumblr if you want to yell at me/talk to me about Dirk Gently/generally freak out over these two idiots.
> 
> Hopefully I'll see you around, and thanks for reading! Happy New Year, wonderful people <3


End file.
